The associate at the prominent Silicon Valley venture capital firm once again looked at the visitor who had just come in, a cold call. His face was familiar; he had definitely seen him somewhere, perhaps even at many places. He will know soon.
“Yes sir, what can I do for you?” he asked the visitor, who was in his late thirties, with long and somewhat bedraggled hair, a beard, and intelligent eyes that seemed to comprise a mix of pathos and benevolence. His overall bearing reminded him of a pastoral chap.
“I have founded a startup and am looking for financial support”
Having been in Silicon Valley for a few years, the associate was not taken aback at all by the person’s appearance. The Valley had seen all sorts of startup founders become successful, even people with long hair and who reminded one of pastoral chaps. As every junior investing professional was told multiple times, even Steve Jobs was a hippie for a while.
“What does your startup do, sir? Do you have an elevator pitch?”.
The man did not seem to have heard of the term but somehow figured it out quickly.
“Yes. In fact, my elevator pitch, as you call it, can be completed within the time taken for a one floor ride.”
The associate was impressed.
“My startup’s value proposition: To save humanity. End of elevator pitch”
The associate was taken aback. Not because it was by far the shortest elevator pitch he had listened to ever in his three-year venture investing career, but because it was the last thing that VCs wanted to hear from a startup.
Saving humanity indeed! Where does a venture capitalist come in?
He was looking for a quick way to end the meeting and see off the prospect.
“Well, sir, you know, we usually invest in business ideas that have the potential to generate financial returns of 10X the investment within three years. Your business case appears like a long-term thing, and revenue prospects appear quite uncertain.” His natural instinct would have made him to just call the whole thing ridiculous, but he had been taught to use polite and professional words.
The visitor seemed to reflect a bit on this. Did the associate see a glint of exasperation in his eyes? After briefly closing his eyes – in which exasperation was succeeded by resolution just before they closed – the visitor said: “Son, I should have perhaps introduced myself. I’m Jesus Christ.”
It is safe to say that the associate had a distinct transformation in his demeanour. He now realized where he had seen the man in front. Jesus, how could he have missed it. Christ!
A few moments elapsed while the associate was adjusting himself to the situation. He then cleared his throat.
“That changes everything, Mr. Christ,” he said, for a moment uncertain how to address Jesus, and taking refuge in the professional template.
Jesus, who was a bit sad when the associate was focussed on just monetary returns, now became a lot more optimistic. All hopes were not lost for humanity. Once they had understood the noble purpose behind an effort, even venture capitalists were willing to be considerate and charitable.
The associate, after looking at Jesus for a brief moment, said, “We can make it 8X in your special case”